Some workplaces proudly cling to the motto “We’re family,” despite all the red flags that statement sends up in employees. These words are empty platitudes if upper management doesn’t genuinely care about employees’ lives outside of work hours.
A woman on TikTok says her manager’s attempt to show generosity is proof that bosses don’t care about their employees, no matter what they say.
A pregnant employee said that her boss didn’t care if she received a gift from her boss for a boy, even though she was expecting a girl.
“If you asked me how it felt when my boss, who I’ve worked with for two and a half years, gave me a baby boy on my last day of work when I was actually having a girl, I would say, ‘It’s okay,'” Hannah Kalmar wrote on TikTok.
“If you asked me more specifically, I would say, ‘It just shows that your job and your bosses don’t care at all about you or the details of your life,'” she continued, before offering advice on how to find a true work-life balance.
She advocated that people view their work as a job and also take care of themselves.
“Take the paid vacation,” she insisted. “Find a new job if you’re being treated poorly. Clock out and go home on time.”
Kalmar’s proposals revolve around the idea that our lives outside of work deserve more attention than our 9-to-5 job.
“Don’t waste energy thinking about a place where you aren’t thought of,” she concluded.
The expectant mother shared a screenshot of her boss’s gift.
“Congratulations on baby number 1!” read the handwritten card. “This baby is so lucky to have you love him.”
Africa Studio | Shutterstock
The contents of the menu were really nice, but the chef’s blatant mistake seemed to destroy any goodwill.
The gift basket was clearly gendered, as if Kalman was expecting a boy. Both the ribbon and the card were blue. The gifts included a stuffed dinosaur, squeaky gummy sharks, and blankets in various shades of blue and gray.
“I wish you all the best!” the boss said goodbye with a slightly businesslike touch.
While some argue that gender covers a wide spectrum, the fact that Kalmar’s boss believed she was having a boy shows that she had ignored a basic fact that the employee shared about her personal life.
The boss’s mistake makes it clear that she wasn’t really listening when the expectant mother revealed an important detail about her pregnancy.
However, according to Forbes, every workplace and every manager is different. Some industries are better suited to more personal relationships between bosses and employees, while others are not. And since there is no one-size-fits-all approach, it’s hard to say that this manager was intentionally obtuse or simply made a mistake.
Everyone makes mistakes, and giving a little girl a stuffed shark isn’t the worst thing you can do, but Kalmar’s point is valid.
Bosses care about profit and performance, not who you are outside of work. When employees realize this truth, they can focus on what matters to them. It gives them permission to take that long-awaited vacation and finish work promptly at 5 p.m. so they can get home and have dinner with their kids.
By sending Kalmar the wrong baby gift, he gave her perspective and insight into what really matters.
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango’s news and entertainment team, covering social issues, pop culture, and all things entertainment.
