Bridesmaid defends herself for giving the bride and groom too little money after spending too much on the wedding

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The internet is coming to the rescue of a bridesmaid after she admitted to reducing the amount of her cash gift to the happy couple.

Taking to Reddit’s popular Wedding Shaming forum, the bridesmaid openly admitted that she now no longer plans to give the bride and groom the same amount as she originally planned after having to spend significant sums to be part of the wedding party. Between the hen party, her dress, the bridal party, and her hair and makeup, the Reddit user said she’s already parted with far too much.

“I had planned to give a close friend $400 from my boyfriend and I as a wedding gift, but I changed my mind,” she wrote, adding that she wanted to reduce the original estimate by $100 or more.

To be completely transparent, the Reddit user detailed the cost of each event and item she had to pay for to be part of the bridal party.

“About $1,000 for the bachelorette party, another $100 (plus alterations) for the dress, over $200 for her party decorations and a gift from the bridal party, and then $250 for hair and makeup if we have both done,” she said.

“She’s giving us better makeup if we choose it and also some jewelry to wear on the wedding day, but I’m financially strapped,” confessed the person with the original poster.

The Reddit user said that the bride’s family is paying for the wedding, so she feels less bad about not writing a big check.

In addition, the Reddit user does not feel like spending too much money on the wedding gift because she knows a friend who did not give the couple anything, even though he had spent so much money on his job as best man.

She admitted: “I have a friend who told his groomsmen not to give a gift because they spent so much. It must be so nice not to feel that obligation as well.”

Anonymous Reddit users agreed that there should be no obligation to get a gift for the bride and groom when spending a lot of money on the wedding reception.

One reader bluntly stated, “Honestly, if I spent that much on stuff, there’s no way I’d give a gift. And if the bride is expecting cash, I’d think she’s greedy.”

“I never gave a gift at any wedding where I was a bridesmaid. If I wasn’t a bridesmaid but was at the bachelorette party, I gave a smaller gift than usual,” noted one experienced woman.

Another agreed: “If you bought decorations for her party AND a gift from the bridal party (weird), then you’re covered for gifts. That’s all you need to give her.”

A former bride shared her experiences with the stressed Redditor.

“My best friend/bridesmaid gave me a set of wine glasses for $40 and I didn’t bat an eyelid,” she admitted. “Bridesmaids spend so much these days. Although some of my bridesmaids gave a large cash gift, I never expected that. It wouldn’t have bothered me even if my best friend had just given me a card. But that’s just me.”

According to The Knot, the average bridesmaid spends about $1,915 on everything from hair and makeup to a bridal shower gift and the bachelorette party. The wedding website also calculated that a bridesmaid typically spends about $170 on a wedding gift for the couple.