Review of a classic album: The Tea Party | Seven Circles

THis book came out in 2004 – or at least I got it then. Here’s what I said about it then (with a few minor edits):

“Darren,” the email began – never a good sign. “We are about to start recording our new Tea Party Record. Any advice to get a better rating from you? … Thanks, Stuart, The Tea Party.”

My answer? Two words: “Yeah, sure.” Can you blame me? After all, it’s not every day – or honestly, not at all – that rock stars ask me for input. I thought I was just being asked by a smartass with a fake TeaParty.com Address.

In short: I wasn’t. After several more letters – all of which I answered disparagingly – a mutual friend from the band’s label assured me that Stuart Chatwoodthe bassist from The Tea Partyactually sent me an email. Of course, by this point Stuart was fed up with me and didn’t respond to my apology. Can you blame him?

However, if he had been an even bigger masochist, I could have summed up my advice in two other words: Relax. Stop trying so hard. Enough of the bombastic songs, the overblown arrangements, the mystical lyrics, the oriental flair and the endless overdubs. How about making an album where you just plug in, turn up the volume and rock out?

Now, after the rehearsal of their sixth CD Seven CirclesI began to believe that Stuart and his bandmates – singer and guitarist Jeff Martin and drummer Jeff Burrows — could have done just that. The first few tracks on this 11-song record are some of the least contrived and most energetic work they’ve done in a long time – perhaps even more so than 2001’s so-called Back to Basics album. Interzone Mantras.

Opening single The writing is on the wall features a boastful, powerful guitar riff, a pumping, funky backbeat and a simple, instantly familiar chorus. Stargazer builds with some neck-sliding power chords before shooting skyward with a surging, melodic chorus. One step closeris, as the title suggests, a yin-yang affair, alternating between a smoky, low-wattage groove and dinosaur-howling riffing. Not bad, I said to myself – three tracks and not an oud within earshot.

Unfortunately, I spoke too soon. After this strong start, the boys lost momentum. And Seven Circles degenerates into – sorry, Stu – just another Tea Party album. Like string sections. And exotic percussion. And ornate, swirling synths. And long-winded, dragging power ballads. And every other cliché that people like me associate with The Tea Party. In this painted desert there is an oasis: Overloada burst of chugging classic rock, one of three songs the hitmaker produced Bob Rock. Thereafter, Seven CirclesThe second half slowly but surely dissolves into nothingness with a series of forgettable mid-tempo rockers and yearning, sultry ballads.

And that’s a real shame. On the one hand, because the band seemed to be on the verge of a musical breakthrough. And on the other hand, because I would love to see a Tea Party a record that rocked from start to finish. But above all, it’s a disappointment, because the only rock star who ever asked me for advice will definitely not want to be a pen pal with me again after this.

In fact, I’m convinced that if I ever get another letter from Stuart, it will only contain two words – and they won’t be “Relax.” Can you blame him?