One day, when Michael Heffler of Sonoman was talking to his 97-year-old friend Bill Jersey, the conversation turned to a skill he wished he had learned as a child but had never read about in any children’s book: how to successfully deal with difficult situations.
The conversation inspired Heffler to publish a book last month called “How to Become Smarter…and Happier,” in the hopes that it will help children gain such insights.
“Everyone has problems, gets sad, gets angry and deals with disappointments,” he said. “I spent a lot of time as a child and as an adult ruminating on difficult things that happened in my life.
“It took me a long time to understand that other people can make me unhappy, angry or sad, but only one person can make me experience these feelings over and over again – myself!”
In the story he uses the metaphor of a fork in the road.
“The young boy in the book, through a conversation with a wise man, modeled on my friend Bill, realizes that he can either take the fork that leads him to continue feeling bad because the kids at his school ignore him, or he can take the other fork where he decides to do something to change the way he feels. Once he realizes there is another way, a path to greater knowledge and happiness opens up for him.”
How to Get Smarter…and Happier is Heffler’s second children’s book. He also wrote Hornwell Honeypicker: The Flying Pig after authoring two books for adults, Climbing Through Life: A Collection of Vignettes and Aging Gracefully, after retiring from a successful career as an executive at Cisco and other companies.
Heffler became interested in writing while working on his bachelor’s degree in English at Rutgers University. He later earned a master’s degree in computer science from the University of Massachusetts Amherst and continued to write stories while building his professional career.
Heffler started cycling in his early 50s and was soon leading group bike tours for cycling clubs.
The editor of a cycling club’s newsletter said she kept hearing from club members how much they enjoyed the rides he led, which took in roads other guides hadn’t included, and they asked him to write about them.
“I didn’t know how to write about a bike ride until I came up with the format of starting the story with an idea and then developing that idea throughout the ride,” Heffler said. “I later learned that a well-known Princeton author, John McPhee, used a similar format for his stories on various topics.”
When Heffler retired from Cisco in 2011, he had some free time, so he expanded the stories and added some quotes and images to complete Climbing Through Life: A Collection of Vignettes.
After the book was published, a Princeton professor who had accompanied Heffler on one of his trips told him that he had worked with several Nobel Prize winners.
“I said, ‘It must be very inspiring to work with so many talented people,'” Heffler said. “He said I inspired him. I just had to hear that story! He said he was overweight and out of shape, and when he read my book, he got back on the bike and got back in shape.”
He decided to write his second book, Aging Gracefully, when he realized he didn’t know his grandfathers very well because they died when he was young.
“I didn’t have a grandchild yet and I wanted to write a book so that he or she would know who I am if the same thing happened,” he said. “I also wrote it to help me think about what I wanted to accomplish when I retired – to be happier and wiser.”
“Aging Gracefully” is both a paperback and an audiobook with music by his wife Carol, a professional singer and musician.
He originally wrote his third book, “Hornwell Honeypicker the Flying Pig,” while he was still a student.
“It sat in my drawer for nearly 50 years until my wife said, ‘You wrote that children’s story a long time ago. Now we have a grandson, so why don’t you finish it?'” Heffler said. “I edited it, made a few changes, found a wonderful illustrator, Lorraine Day, and published it.”
The book is an adventure story with heroes, friends, villains, monsters and tyrants.
“The message is that when you’re in trouble, the best thing you can do is be kind to yourself so you can think clearly and decide what to do,” Heffler said. “It also shows that friends can help you.”
All proceeds from the sale of his books go to childhood cancer research and are intended to help reduce the number of children worldwide who are at risk of cancer.
Heffler has an idea for another children’s book, but said he’s “still playing around with it.”
He and Carol moved to Sonoma in 2020 to be close to their son Ethan, daughter-in-law Maya, and two grandchildren, Benji and Casey.
In his retirement, Heffler enjoys “being a good grandpa.”
He is also a member of the Rotary Club of Sonoma Valley, where he serves on the Environmental Committee and is responsible for communications.
“I enjoy the community work I’m involved in,” he said. “I also hike, bike and play pétanque at Depot Park. I had never heard of pétanque until I came here. It may be the first French word I’ve ever pronounced correctly, and it’s a much more interesting game than I first thought.”
Reach reporter Dan Johnson at [email protected].
